Depression and Anxiety

Depressed on Sunday (Celexa 15)

I felt progressively more depressed today. Saturday was fine, and I felt adamant that I would not experience it on Sunday but it didn't listen. Sunday is cursed. My swim went well. Then my dad took me shopping in his car. He put me on edge. His conversation is always so instructive and anxiety producing. I receive constant advice. Then on the way home he got caught in traffic and became moody. He talked too much about dieting, and I told him how the interaction with Grandma Sylvia was not helpful (see first post, I think). We were driving one another insane. I suppose this is the sort of stuff I could yammer about in therapy. Later in the evening I spoke with my ex, S., on the phone (she called), and I cried (barely) while complaining about life. We had a nice conversation Friday (she called) but tonight I wasn't sure if I should be talking to an ex twice in a weekend, and I was already in a bad mood. She tends to play off my moods, so the conversation left me with negative feelings. I'm thinking again of going back to the Zoloft. I think that the Celexa leaves me improved but dysthymic. Sometimes I feel slightly manic and other times somewhat zombie-like. The zombie feeling is such an improvement from the pain of depression. I'm scared to make a move with switching because I like to feel sure of my plan, since switching is jarring to me and to my system. I will probably end up switching to the Zoloft. Thanks to all who have been supportive with my depression. It's very appreciated.

posted by Jayla @ Sunday, September 26, 2004